I have always dreamt of changing the world, or at least, a portion of it.
As a child, I was already convicted about having my own unique voice and mission, but that belief changed as I grew older and gained more “realistic” responsibilities.
I became convinced that my dreams were immature.
On top of that, I was often told that my dreams “limited” me to being a great mother and wife though these were all I should allow myself to be—because they are the most noble of all titles.
Other people’s opinions made me believe that to dream of creating impact and leading the charge seemed vain and I didn’t want that… So I rejected the voice inside of me that whispered, “DREAM BIG, JANUARY. EXPAND!”
It was replaced by a nagging voice that told me I would be a bad mother if I ever tried to do anything that required me to leave my children for more than half an hour.
I started to believe that being there in every second of their lives was what qualifies to be a good mother, and that working on my passion meant guilt.
There is no doubt that my family needs my presence… Being a mom will always be my first priority, but that doesn’t mean I should abandon that voice in my heart which eventually screamed, “DO SOMETHING GREAT FOR HUMANITY!”
BUT HOW? How can you do both?
Well, the truth is, what qualifies me to become a great mother is not equal to the amount of time or seconds I spend with my children. There are plenty of moms who are present every step of the way, but are resentful, jealous, tired, angry, and frustrated.
My problem was that I equated my self-worth, based on how much I poured into motherhood, 24 hours a day. The privilege of sitting on the couch for just five minutes to sip a hot cup of coffee, or taking half an hour to get dressed and ready have become a nagging guilt trip!
Honestly, how have I allowed myself to believe that becoming a great mom to my children meant losing myself?!
To serve others without serving our own needs is a suicide mission. My beliefs robbed me of my other call, which was to serve human hearts outside of my home.
Looking back, I realize that I have been telling myself lies that convinced me to play it safe and small.
Growing up, my mother was busy working all day long. She had no time for us, because she devoted it to building a business. This is why I collapsed being an entrepreneur with being a bad mother.
I didn’t know to tell myself another story. That was my experience, that was my story.
I felt in every fiber of my being that I was born to help other ladies, and fortunately, I met another woman who mentored me out of desperation. The need to give back grew inside of me, and that desire pulsated in my heart even after I became a mother.
“How can you be a good mom if someone else is taking care of your children for three hours out of the day?” I remember being asked this nagging question. It made me think that other women were criticizing me, and I responded by proving them wrong. I made sure I was present for my kids all day long.
And though I fought for my call to teach women… I was sleeping for only four hours, just so I could work while my kids were sleeping. I compromised my health for fear of criticism.
We cannot live our lives based on the opinions of people around us, who might not understand our dreams.
What if you were meant to find the cure for cancer—but you dropped that call because your belief is being a good mother = 24 hours a day?
Rise above false assumptions on motherhood and dreaming. Stay out of that drama. Instead, choose to follow your dreams… To train your mind and learn new skills to turn them into reality.
You should have no time for nonsense.
With enough creativity and persistence, YOU CAN become a present mama while fully running your own business and making time for your life’s work. It could have been tough to do in the past, but the world has changed. All things are now possible.
What are you waiting for? Give yourself the gift of expanding your dreams.
Listen to my podcasts if you need that extra sprinkle of motivation!